Changed For the Better

“I’ve heard it said That people come into our lives for a reason.
Bringing something we must learn, And we are led
To those who help us most to grow, If we let them.
And we help them in return.
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true, But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you…
Like a comet pulled from orbit, As it passes a sun. Like a stream that meets a boulder, Halfway through the wood, Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better? But because I knew you, I have been changed for good.
It well may be, That we will never meet again, In this lifetime. So let me say before we part, So much of me, Is made of what I learned from you. You’ll be with me Like a handprint on my heart, And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine By being my friend…
Like a ship blown from its mooring, By a wind off the sea, Like a seed dropped by a skybird, In a distant wood, Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you. Because I knew you. I have been changed for good.
h the wood.” – Wicked
This is probably the only way I can accurately describe THON and my DRCM committee.  This weekend was amazing. Picture this: sitting around in a circle with 37 people who were once strangers, and now know some of your deepest loves, fears, heartaches, and more.  We had so many laughs and a decent amount of cries but I honestly don’t think I have felt this loved since my Nana and John were alive. As we sat, we discussed the good the bad and the ugly.  No questions asked, just acceptance and love.  Picture a perfect world where there was only acceptance and love? Crazy right?
Crazy that I had to go to therapy for the longest time to try to help me figure out my emotion and struggles and yet I find peace with them in a group of strangers that are now my family.
I am independent, I am strong, but when the shower walls can no longer be my backbone and I need to cry, I have learned that there is something beautiful about crying (most definitely not my face!!).  It is this moment where you let your heartache out and your heart spills out these tears making more room for love. So as I sat there on our last go around, my eyes remained closed and phrases like “someone who makes you happy. someone who shows strength and resilience. someone who is creative. someone you trust. someone you could tell anything to.. etc” were said, and unknown members of this family tapped my head. I sat there fidgeting with my rings on my left hand, as tears ran down my face.  But this time this wasn’t the familiar heartache.  This weekend my heart was so full of love that by the end, it was overflowing; these are happy tears.

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